for those of you who have been around on this journey with me since early days, you have seen my oldest son grow up. (well, not so much anymore since he’s sixteen now and he’s his own person. but, he’s taller than me, he’s driving, he has a job, he’s a straight a student, he + his brother have their own little business, he’s doing amazing.) with growing up comes these big changes i just mentioned, along with starting conversations about what comes after high school.

he has chosen that a four-year college or university will be his path. as of now, he believes that engineering will be his path of study. with that, it’s starting to think about where could be the right place for his next adventure. there are in-state options and out-of-state options. there’s thinking about a big school versus a small school. there’s thinking about how far from home might be comfortable for him.

i know most families don’t start thinking through this until junior or senior year of high school. that’s when the rubber meets the road. but as i was thinking about our oldest and his personality and our family, i asked, “why couldn’t we start checking places out before junior or senior year? why couldn’t we take low pressure visits to some school options? why couldn’t we figure out a way to narrow the list down before we do the official visits?” enter in what we’ve dubbed the college vibe visit.

our family started these college vibe visits during summer of 2024. what does it include? for our first trip to purdue university (his dad’s alma mater!), we went to west lafayette as a family for the weekend. we set our own schedule. we didn’t do an official, formal campus tour. we walked the campus and checked out the highlights and the must-visit campus spots to see/eat at. we hit up the campus bookstore for swag. the kids had a blast. we had a great time as a family. and it was low pressure for him + us. (his post-purdue opinion: it’s on the short list for a follow-up, junior year official visit.)

we did another one of these vibe visits this past spring break when we did an overnight to iowa state university (my dad + mom’s/his papa + mimi’s alma mater!) in ames, iowa. this visit took us about 4-1/2 hours from home and helped show him a little different type of campus feel. we also went while classes were in session, so we were able to walk the campus on a day that students were there, buildings were open, which helped us to get a different feel. the biggest takeaway from this trip: his ability to compare a little smaller feel of a school with a different town set up. (his post-iowa state opinion: it’s on the short list for an official visit.)

we have a couple of additional schools on the list to check out throughout the rest of this summer + in the fall. the university of illinois – urbana/champaign and marquette university are both in our plans. (tip: check out summer camps at schools that might be of interest to your kiddo. he’s heading up to marquette for a week next month to attend an engineering summer camp, which will automatically give him such a great vibe experience!)

is this the best approach for every family and every student? nope. for our family, we hope this helps. before we did this he had only ever been to two college campuses, both of which were opposite ends of the size spectrum for him. i’m hoping this helps quell any anxiety on his part once the official college visits start by already having a feel for the type of campus that he feels might be the best kind of space for him. plus, it’s become this great family time that is great for connection and helping both of our kids experience new places!